In This Newsletter
*Feature Article:
Moving Through What Is Hard
*Feature Program:
Trust Your Power with A Course in Miracles
*Feature Retreat:
Kripalu Center, MA
Unleash Your Calling
*Feature 1-Min Video:
Inspiration for Maverick Souls
*Tama’s Support Menu:
More Inspired Opportunities!
Moving Through What Is Hard
By Tama Kieves:
Ever feel like you hate the part of yourself that gets triggered? The one that feels envy, uncertainty, or failure?
Now I am no Florence Nightingale when it comes to tending to myself in emotional pain.
But I am learning how to turn emotional pain into emotional gain.
Recently I wrote in my journal “I want to meet the part of me that is hurting. I want to build a hammock for her out of honey. I want to create a sacred experience. There is a part of me that feels small and unwanted, endangered, not popular, not loved, not shiny and abundant.
I want to tend this one who is suffering from shame and waves of fear. I want to place her in a hammock in the shade. I want to surround her with lilacs that bloom in every season, just because. I want her to rest. I want to let her burst open with dark emotions if she needs, feelings that have often made me uncomfortable. I will not discriminate against these feelings. This is a sacred moment. All my moments are sacred.”
The power of simply being with myself, being present, is healing. What does that mean? It means not running away and not asking myself to be different. Breathing deeply. Breathing mindfully. This is how my God finds me. This is how a silky presence weaves me together. This is how I show love to myself.
I allow my pain to have a seat at the table.
Self-acceptance wears a yellow green velvet gown, and holds my hand, so that I am not alone.
Contrary to what I sometimes think, I will not die because I feel an uncomfortable feeling.
A feeling or emotion will not take me out. I am anchoring in compassion for the part of myself that feels this pain.
I know this pain is not the whole story.
It is a black tulip in the garden. Observing a painful emotion is as though I am noticing the rain and the clouds. This is the weather of the moment. It’s not the future. It’s not forever. And it’s not my self-definition or identity. But it is here now. And I want to be present. I am committed to not pushing any part of myself or my life away.
So, when I feel embarrassment or failure or jealousy I cannot shake, I do not want to shun these feelings or lecture at them with very excellent points about spirituality or philosophy. Instead of preaching to myself about “rising higher,” I want to actually do it, rise higher and be loving towards this feeling.
I want to put cool compresses on my forehead, each scented with cucumber and sweetgrass. I will listen to my pain, hear its story, without correction, deflection, or an immediate ten-point action plan.
This is not wallowing. This is not encouraging victimhood. This is not going down a dark path and investing more in darkness. This is proclaiming my life. This is allowing my life to be a river, flowing through different iterations, but not losing integrity.
Self-kindness is transmutation
Self-kindness is taking the sting out of the emotion, removing the burr from my paw. It’s bringing the poison out from the darkness, altering its chemistry in the sun. I have never been good at being, especially with myself. I want to do something. Fix it. make it go away. But self-trust is about knowing that I can trust myself to be here for myself and I can move through what is hard.
Usually when difficult feelings arise, we want to run with lightning speed in the other direction. But beingness is slowing down. Paying attention. Becoming curious. With mercy. And no self-judgment, as in no other parts of myself heckling sotto voce “you weak namby pamby.”
How long can you be with yourself in a painful emotion before you skip out, turn your attention away? Welcome the chance to do this. Know that every moment of being with an experience is restoring you. This is healing. This is taking the pain of a thousand bee stings or lumps of shame and giving them release. This is reclamation. Buddhist nun and meditation teacher Pema Chodron says “To stay with that shakiness—to stay with uncertainty and fear and groundlessness—is the only way to train our hearts.”
What would it be like to stop running from yourself– and start running toward yourself?
I don’t know about you, but I am making the decision to not be overwhelmed by less preferential feelings. I will be strengthened by them.
It’s insane to pretend that life is all happy moments and we aren’t mad with fear or anguish at times. Fighting back the fears takes so much energy. And lately maybe those fears are getting louder. We do not live in a shiny world of endless ease or happy moments. And yet the miraculous is here. The wisdom teaching of A Course in Miracles reminds us “Let all things be exactly as they are.” Because when we stop resisting our lives, we discover our light and power.
But we are not taught the most basic self-care. We are not taught how to be with ourselves in companionship. Or how to be present in our lives.
The next time a painful emotion or story arises in you, you may want to try these 3 things:
- Breathe deeply.
- Notice the feeling. Where is it in your body?
- Send this feeling love. Let it know you will listen without judgement.
This is mindfulness. It is holy. Meditation gurus have said this for centuries. Peak performance coaches and therapists of every stripe have joined this bandwagon. Neuroscience points in the same direction. It’s often called “nervous system regulation” — really, the shift from a sympathetic, fight-or-flight state into a parasympathetic, rest-and-receive state.
Tending your own feelings will change your life.
And that presence will extend to others and softly yet dynamically change the energy you bring into any room. This month I invite you to keep your heart open to yourself in an area where you feel discomfort. Become a self-compassion warrior. Don’t underestimate the power. Pema Chodron says, “War and peace start in the human heart. Whether that heart is open or whether that heart closes has global implications.”
*****
Here’s my Coaching Practice for You this Month:
Jot a few lines on what just came up for you as you read this. Or what feelings do you tend to shun? How can you be more mindful and self-compassionate?
(Quick… email us and tell me your first thoughts or intentions for yourself this month. Sharing IS strengthening! I will hold it with you in love.)
With love and fierce support,
Want to share this piece? Please do!
We only ask that you keep the full message intact. And remember, your loved one can get their own Inspired Messages delivered from Tama by signing up here.
© 2026 Tama Kieves. All rights reserved.
TAMA: Honors graduate of Harvard Law School turned mojo career catalyst.
Best-selling author of This Time I Dance!: Creating the Work You Love, Inspired & Unstoppable: Wildly Succeeding in Your Life’s Work!, A Year Without Fear: 365 Days of Magnificence, and also Thriving Through Uncertainty.
Do you find yourself hesitating, second-guessing, and yearning for your life of purpose and abundance? This weekly oasis of support will help you trust your power—and know exactly what to do. The inspired techniques in this program are time-tested and have shifted thousands! With smart, conscious, loving community.
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UNLEASH YOUR CALLING: Creating the Work and Life You Love is Tama’s BEST retreat all year! Join us at the world-class Kripalu Center in the beautiful and healing Berkshire mountains of MA. Experience breakthroughs, soaring clarity and direction, plus optional yoga classes, spa services, organic gourmet meals & walks in the woods during New England’s beautiful leaf-changing season…
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Check Out this One-Minute Video! This 60 second reel just went viral on Instagram. It’s an infusion of energy and my message to you. Perhaps there’s someone you know who could use this message, too! Click below:
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September 2 | Wednesday @ 8 pm ET + recorded
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September 10 | Thurdays @ 8pm ET + recorded
Miraculous Listening Coach Training
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September 15 | Tuesday @ 8pm ET + recorded
FREE Bonus Class! Trust Your Power with A Course in Miracles
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September 16 | Wednesday @ 8 pm ET + recorded
The Inspired & Unstoppable Life Tribe
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September 22 | Tuesdays @ 8pm ET + recorded
Trust Your Power with A Course in Miracles
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October 12-16 | Retreat at Kripalu, MA
Unleash Your Calling: Creating the Work and Life You Love
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